by Kristen Bagwell

Isn't it funny how friends speak their own language? I am not someone who has a ton of friends, but rather, a few friends whom I've been lucky enough to have for years and years. We've pretty much always spoken and understood each other in different ways. Let me explain what I mean.

If I were to say, "I am 10 lbs heavier than I was this time last year, and I just can't seem to shake the rest of the baby weight." Here are the responses I'd get (or have gotten...hypothetically, of course):

Friend 1 - The Defender
"On whose scale? If you lost 10 lbs you'd blow away! Did someone tell you that you need to lose weight? Tell me who. I will call them up myself."

Friend 2 - The Smoother
"I like those jeans on you, they look great." This means "I agree that you have gained a little weight, but I love you and want you to feel good about yourself."

Friend 3 - The Truth-Teller
"Well, you may have gained a couple of pounds but I can't tell. And besides, it's not like you have to get in a swimsuit any time soon."

Friend 4 - The Supporter
"What do you expect? You're a working parent and have zero time to work out, not to mention being stressed most of the time."


Let's try another one. How about, "My husband is driving me up a wall lately and it's completely irrational...he is on my last nerve for no real reason." (Again, completely hypothetical.)

Friend 1 - The Defender
"Men are crazy. Tell him to shape up or he'll have me to deal with."

Friend 2 - The Smoother
"Every couple has rough spots, you know."

Friend 3 - The Truth-Teller
"To be honest, he'd be driving me crazy too based on what you've said. I am sure that doesn't help but you're always welcome to vent."

Friend 4 - The Supporter
"Girl, who are you telling. Last night my DH ____________  (fill in the blank with something commiserate-ey)."

Everyone should be lucky enough to have these women on their side. Who are your closest friends?