Saturday, August 25, 2012
by guest blogger Kelsey T.
On any given morning in the Thomas household...
A) You brushed your teeth like you were supposed to.
B) "Deer in headlights" You realize you were supposed to brush your teeth and hope not to get in trouble.
If you answered B, when pressed, you:
A) Admit that you hadn’t, and go straight upstairs to brush.
B) Reiterate that you absolutely DID brush your teeth.
If you answered B, when asked to come breathe on your mother, you:
A) Admit that actually, you haven’t brushed. Apologize. Go straight upstairs to brush.
B) Come breathe your stinking, morning breath, unbrushed-teeth-breath on your mother and continue insisting that you are completely minty fresh.
If you answered B, even after the ensuing dark assurances that your dishonesty will cost you privileges and benefits, you:
A) Apologize. Cry. Brush your teeth while laden with sorrow and repentance.
B) Continue to insist you brushed. First say you just didn’t use very much toothpaste, then insist you brushed, but without toothpaste.
If you answered B:
A) You are a terrible liar, my child.
B) Now you’ve gotten a consequence, AND a lecture, AND your mother is just plain irritated because we are on a timeline here.
C) You are so, so sad....with the sadness, and the "misunderstoodness", and the tragedy of it all.
D) All of the above. GO BRUSH YOUR TEETH.